by Sean Stone-Ashe
When a child begins music lessons, the chief goal of these lessons is obviously to promote musical growth, and provide the child with the tools necessary to be successful in the world of music.
However, by building a long-term working relationship with their private instructor, it is inevitable that these teachers become valuable mentors for their students, guiding them through their musical journey and providing a mature voice of reason in their life as a trusted authority figure.
Having access to a private music teacher provides an uncommon experience for many youths, in which they receive significant one-on-one time with an adult other than their parents. This is an unmistakably valuable resource, as children don’t often get to receive regular direct interaction with adults in a positive and collaborative way.
This one-on-one dynamic between an adult and child becomes especially significant during teenage years in middle school and high school. As a child starts to develop their own interests and world views, it is important to have those perspectives encouraged or challenged by an adult with greater maturity and a wider perspective on the world.
Having this additional adult perspective in a child’s life can help balance out some questionable and immature world views the child may be exposed to through their young peers. It can also help reinforce positive attitudes and behaviors that are encouraged by parents which a child may be more prone to ignore.
It is certainly the case that we all go through phases where we are becoming more deaf to parental advice, despite the good intention, maturity and long-term outlook these bits of advice may entail. However, when a child hears some of that same advice echoed by a private music instructor, they may start to realize that it’s not just their parents being overly picky and crazy!
That same advice can also carry more weight if it comes from somebody the child admires for their musical skills or other personal qualities.
In my own teaching, I don’t go drastically out of my way to give off-topic life advice. However, it is inevitable that areas of a student’s life outside of music come up, or an issue impacting their musical learning may have broader application to other areas of their life. I always take these opportunities to provide my perspective, and give insight into more than just the immediate musical learning we are trying to accomplish.
Sometimes I reflect on the fact that my relationship with some of my students may be among the strongest relationships they have with an adult in their life. If a child comes from a larger family, their time with me may be the most one-on-one time with an adult they receive in their life.
Therefore, this private lesson experience is of critical value to young students, providing them with an opportunity for mentorship and personal growth beyond the immediate tasks of learning music.
Students who are engaging in music in a particularly passionate way tend to be especially receptive to mature advice and character-building opportunities from their private teacher. As a private teacher, it is a privilege to be entrusted with such an important duty, and it is a pleasure to see music students blossoming through their connection to music and their instructor.
